My cunt is my temple, I like it to be worshipped.
When I have a willing licker at my service, I am always surprised at how eager they are – their readiness to eat me to completion.
I enjoy looking down and seeing a head buried in my pussy, while I scream and moan and tell them to eat me.
Yet when I actually smothered a lover with my cunt by sitting on his face, I came almost instantly.
It was the control.
I was face fucking him, his tongue lapping at my clit and savouring my juice.
He begged me to do it, I had never done it before. I was rough and my thrusts brutal. At one point I stopped to check if he was still breathing.
He moaned: Please don’t stop
His cock was firm, black and thick. I had to suck it and played with his balls, I lubed my fingers and entered his arse slowly. He let out a deep erotic sigh and his come spurted out, thick, white and salty.
I licked his come and he kissed me so that he could taste it. Dirty boy.
He got down on his knees and caressed my thighs, stroked me until I came.
I jumped up and sat on his face again, he sniffed my cunt for ages and said that he was in love with me.
I got off and said “What?”.
Him: I love you
Me: I love you too
Him: I mean it, this is more than sex, more than me eating your cunt
Me: So what do you want?
Him: To be with you
I was stuck, he wanted marriage, the whole nine yards. I wanted to be free.
Initially he had said that he wanted an open relationship, but whenever we were out he got jealous if another man looked at me. The sex was great but I knew that it would not last.
During a fetish episode he switched without my permission and became dominant. I hated it.
Me: What are you doing?
Him: You need to do as you are told
Me: This isn’t working
Him: Why?
Me: I can’t do this
Him: Shit, you always have to be in control
Me: Yes I do
Him: Why?
Me: No man tells me what to do
Him: Lighten up
Me: You are telling me what to do outside of play
Him: And?
Me: Did I say that I was sub, did I say I wanted a Dom?
Him: No but, I
Me: Look, this will not work.
And just like that, my cunt worshipper was gone. I missed him something rotten. He called me and asked me what exactly had happened and I said that it did not matter.
It was at that precise moment, that I knew that I would never really be happy as purely sub, that I had a dominant streak and was in fact a bossy bitch when I wanted to be.
My next worshipper was by accident, he was strictly vanilla. I tempted him by dipping my fingers into my pussy and invited him to lick them clean.
As he got closer I slowly pushed his head and told him to suck my clit, he obeyed immediately. I could not believe, how easy it was. He licked and sucked, he spent a long time down there.
Me: You cunt worship?
Him: Yes, why
Me: You never said
Him: You never asked
Me: I did think to ask, but was afraid
Him: I am one kinky bastard
Me: Hmm this sounds good
Him: Finger me babe
Me: Oh my god, you want my fingers in you
Him: Yes
I had found my match, no bossy demands, no offers of marriage and him wanting me to wash his smelly underpants. I had a kinky lover and partner. Bliss.
Yes, I’m a control freak, I know that in many ways that this puts off potential playmates, but I always say what I am and what I need from the beginning.
Do I miss sex? Yes, of course I do. I miss the intimacy and of course using my strap on with a nice firm arse in front of me. Yet I know that fucking the next willing person will not suffice. I want a life partner.
Whilst looking for a partner, I had a date with a potential playmate who bored me silly. His sex chat was amazing, but outside of it we had nothing in common.
I considered this situation for days and asked myself “Should I just fuck him?”.
I did not fuck him, play or cyber I could not do it.
So what have I learnt, perhaps I am not sub after all…