I’ve not written a Saturday Sauce post in a while, in fact months I think, trying to think when I wrote the last one. But here goes, what have I been up to, well if you are on my Twitter, you will have heard me talking about my BBM group The Pleasure Zone, which is for open-minded peeps. I’m just realising how difficult it is to find people who are into the same things as me.
Although I’m a member of several other BBM groups, sites etc…finding a black bi woman who wants to play exclusively with me is proving to be impossible. I have not given up as such, but I’m just not looking at the moment. Do I think that I will somehow bump into her whilst shopping, maybe.
BBM is the best when you’re thinking of having a bit of fun, no need for numbers, totally discreet, but then there is another side to it. I have lost count of the show me your tits requests, do I really want to be showing my tits all the time, in the hope that I might play with that person.
And that’s just the thing, on BBM your display pic can be saved, it can be shared in other groups without you even knowing. I’m all for being sexually free, but it really has made me think about how much privacy I have whilst being on BBM, Facebook, Twitter and with writing this blog.
Black Swingers
I have met some amazing people online, I applaud them on their ability to be so sexually free, I’m slowly learning about new things and places to go, and things to do. I needed to make these connections, I was beginning to think for a while that I was the only one. It is so refreshing to chat with black women who are not sexually repressed, I am tired of hearing that lame old line, black women are not freaky enough. My answer is that you have not meet all black women and cannot speak for all of us.
The black men are also very interesting, sexy, freaky and very adventurous…
Voicenotes
I’m sure I’ve written about Voicenotes before, now if I get a sexy voicenote…I’m happy, endless BBM chat back and forth helps when you are trying to get to know someone, but seriously though I have a thing for sexy voicenotes, and have sent plenty in my time.
Swinging
I feel like a newbie still, probably because I am, can I really call myself a swinger, when I have only had a small number of freaky encounters? That’s the thing with labels they are restrictive…so I suppose what I’m saying is, I am what I am.
Sexuality in the Black Community
I’m now quite open about my sexuality and came out as bi to some of family and friends recently, but there are times when I feel like I have to hide who I am. The worst was when this guy was walking on the road, shouting out at the top of his voice that lesbians, bisexuals and gay men were evil. Why didn’t I confront him, why didn’t I say something. The sad thing is years ago, many years ago, I used to think that bisexuality and homosexuality were wrong, I had the same mindset as him, although I wasn’t shouting about it in the streets. I held up my bible and was using scripture to justify my reasons.
Basically I was a hypocrite. I had been repressing my feelings. I can remember the first time I went out to a club and a woman pressed herself up on me. I nearly passed out!! It was that good, I’ve played with women secretly for years, a touch here, a caress there. But I’ve never had a woman all to myself.
Sometimes I feel like being bi, is a strange place to be…when talking with a lesbian recently she said that women like me are dangerous as I could easily leave her for a man. I had never looked at it that way, love is love is it not, irrespective of the person’s sexuality. I am quite capable of loving or having sex with both men and women.
I’ve read some info about the poly lifestyle, which was recommended to me by an excellent writer on Twitter (thank you). I want to go out and meet other like-minded black people who have the same views on sexuality.
I often feel like I can’t say that I enjoy sex with men and women to all the people who know me, certain that a lot of my friendships would end. I know this as before in my pre Poly, fetish, bisexuality life, I rejected someone just because I could not understand her sexuality. Was I being a cow for that? Maybe, I was a different person back then, I suppose she could see my love of women way before I could…I owe her an apology.
Years later, here I am making connections with peeps that are bi, straight, gay, lesbian, switch, domme, sub, poly…and if that makes me a bit strange or weird so be it. In the space of eight weeks my life has changed so much. I suppose I’m no longer content with settling, the plans for a husband and the house with the perfect conservatory and a car parked in the garage are truly long gone.
Fetish
I have been asked many times if I have considered becoming a domme and there is speculation about how much of my Mistress Black stories are really about me. There are domme classses that I can take and maybe in the future when Vanilla Land is not so hectic I might consider it. I was told that I’m a natural, (blushes)…but my question is are sensual dommes popular?
Then there is the issue of me being a black woman, there are times when I feel like I’m a fetish…especially for non -black guys, the emails I get about my chocolate skin and being exotic are too much. I’m a black woman who enjoys kinky sex, and there are many more out there just like me.
That’s a wrap, I need to answer some emails on Fetlife.
Kinky Blessings
Pashun
x
